Gigan for Bittersweetness
by Aerik Francis
Colorado, USA
Joy lives somewhere in my ear. Sometimes I thump out my joy
with 808’s. When I shower, I feel it slide down my back. There is a sonic
boom, gentle, that reaches my joy with its sound. It ricochets
in my skull, caresses my tongue with its lingering flavor, pours
out of my mouth. The first time I tasted grief
was the first time I choked on joy. My lips curled into smile– not a happy
grin, it quivered in confusion. My teeth in a chattering overbite, wincing
from the bitter, the sour. Sometimes this taste returns on its own time.
In the torrent, the smell of joy perfumes the taste of grief, nervous
system shocked sorrow, spiced. I chew. I swallow. I chew. I swallow.
How I search. Joy lives somewhere in my body in my gut in my mouth.
My lips curl around the taste of joy. How all my feelings become meal. Eventually
excretion - they do leave me. With time I forget the taste
of either, ethereal. I forget the sensation of their mixture.
I remember forgetting – is this called craving? Seasoning of nostalgia.
Food for feeling, the music will replay, however bittersweet.
Aerik Francis
Aerik Francis is a Queer Black & Latinx poet & teaching artist based in Denver, Colorado, USA. Aerik is a recipient of poetry fellowships from CantoMundo and The Watering Hole. They are an event coordinator for Slam Nuba and a poetry reader for Underblong poetry journal. They have poetry published in Borderlands: Texas Poetry Review, Wildness, Ghost City Press, and other locations and anthologies. Find them on IG/TW @phaentompoet